I don’t like ethical rules of the form “do not do Thing to members of Group,” I much prefer ethical rules of the form “do not do Thing to People”
because IME whenever you say the latter people start rules-lawyering about whom they get to be mean to
"we’re not supposed to misgender trans people, but transtrenders and genderspecials aren’t really trans"
"we’re not supposed to make fun of women for being unfashionable or having messy homes, but we can do it to men, right?"
"okay, we won’t bully autistic people who stim, but we can bully other people who stim and we’ll call it appropriation so we get SJ Points"
no. you do not get to be mean to anyone. I am firm on this point